It's a New Week

I cannot believe how tired I am today. What is wrong with me? I could barely stay awake for more than an hour or so. I kept falling asleep all day long. They left without me today, cause I fell asleep again.
I eventually got up, oh somewhere around four. Even then everything I did just wore me out in minutes.Kept having to go lie down and rest. What is wrong with me?
I certainly am not going to be able to get up and function at six. I'll be lucky to make it up for quarter to to get them all to zoo school.
Snap! Zoo School. How am I going to spend three days at the Zoo? I couldn't even leave my house today? Just so bloody tired.
Going to see if a really good night sleep helps. Already had boiling hot shower, nice and warm and relaxed.
This week is going to really suck. I hate out of town job runs.
I am not going to have a moment to myself anywhere.
Between days at zoo and then early days at tkd I'm all booked.
Hopefully this next weekend will be a good one. Time out so to speak. Looking forward to it.

There is that whole contest to make sure is resolved. Call Zak somewhere tomorrow when I those oh so many free minutes.

That change in the wind is close. Right on my heels. I can feel it like a wave just before it crashes over you, standing in the coolness of the shadow, the second where you hold your breath. That's what it feels like tonight.

My dreams are not helping. And there is nothing I can do about them. Changing the channel just doesn't seem to even apply. Over and over. No one to really talk to about them either. They just don't make any sense. Would not want anyone getting in that part of my head.

I did learn what that symbol meant, only cause Reenie and Ra sent me one. I feel like an idiot for not seeing it and having to ask what it was. Sometimes I'm just not paying all that much attention. Naivety is just stupid.

It is really going to be tough being on my own all night and day this week. No relief when I am just so tired
I realized something yesterday.
When I woke up, I didn't hurt. Not even a little bit, later on the scar was even itchy, very itchy.
It didn't last long, by the time I made it to bed, pain was back in full force. Burning, piercing.
It was nice to not feel that for a little while. Atleast it wasn't the other roving pains coming back again. I can't handle that anymore. Not feeling it was great. Gives me hope for the future. Maybe all this stuff we changed up will make the difference. I could even feel and almost see the hollow in the shadow part, where it was not filling up anymore. Even today, the shadow mark doesn't hurt. That something forming there seems to have drained away. It's just a hollow. The scar itself painful. Even the muscle tissue is very tender. I also noticed that the last bits of shadowing from the black marks are also finally fading. This is good. But I am going to focus on the no pain part. I know now it is possible. Get there, bit by bit. One step at a time.

Now I'm really beat. Even this took so much energy.
Draining the batteries.
On to bed and a new week.
I'm excited.
Peal away the griping and worry. Mostly excited.
No more Mochas though.