Renewal

There are somethings you do that are like withdrawals from your bank account. Then there are other things that are like deposits. They fill you back up inside (no not like that either). Balancing everything out, when you do both that is.
I haven't done allot my usual deposits lately. Today I did and more than just me noticed. I had been missed. That was a nice feeling.
I've been in hiding without really even realizing it.
Done some pretty big things for me anyway, this weekend.
This week I step up do even bigger things.

I am doing that single thing again this week, night and day. That alone is going to make it tough.
Not to mention all the other things combined with life's daily grind to do.
This is where I shine.

Now that I am ready for.

Being topped up today was a really good feeling. I still feel that bit of disconnection. As though I don't feel things quite as deeply, like a blanket effect.
I don't know it's hard to explain.

I don't want to be the spectator in my own life.
I don't even want to be the active participant.
I want to be leader and author of my own life.
I am the one who writes my own story, I decide who I'll be
What goes in the plot and what will not is pretty much up to me.

It's my turn.